Post-Affair: How do You Love a Cheating Spouse Again?

September 2nd, 2015

After an affair, when your connection to your spouse has been so cruelly ruptured, you may not know how you can ever pick up the pieces and move forward to the point that you can truly feel love for your spouse again.

If you are trying to save and rebuild your marriage, having worked through negative thoughts and affair images and gotten off the emotional rollercoaster, you may feel you’ve created enough solid ground to consider the question of falling in love with your spouse again.

In this blog, I’ll give you the three key ingredients necessary to be successful at falling in love all over again with your spouse. Read on…

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Get a Grip on This Before It Destroys Your Marriage

July 1st, 2015

Conflict is an inevitable part of marriage. Bringing two people together, at some point, there is bound to be conflict. Everyone forms their own ideas and opinions based on a host of things such as their family backgrounds, life experiences and personalities.

It doesn’t mean it has to destroy your marriage, though. In a marriage, conflicts that are mishandled can shred your connection with your spouse. If an affair is added to the mix, you’re strained to the breaking point.

In this post, we’ll take a look at how you can resolve conflict with your husband or wife in a way that doesn’t damage your relationship—especially if you’re working to save your marriage after an affair. Please keep reading…

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One Step Forward to Rebuilding Your Marriage

April 6th, 2012

After an affair, how can you and your spouse communicate again at a level where you can move forward?

Maybe every attempt to talk quickly dissolves into shouting out your anger, frustration and pain. You may not be able to believe anything your spouse says.

In this blog, I am going to share with you one of the most critical components that must be agreed upon by both partners in order to establish a strong communication pathway so you can save your marriage. Keep reading…

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How to Forgive After an Affair

November 23rd, 2011

How to forgive after an affair is a complex issue. Many victims of a spouse’s affair are fearful of offering forgiveness when there’s the nightmarish possibility that he or she will do it again.

You want to know how to forgive after an affair so you can move on, but it seems like doing so will leave you vulnerable, and no one wants to feel that degree of vulnerability.

In this blog, we’ll explore how to forgive after an affair, and I’ll offer the steps necessary for you to move past the post-affair anguish and toward a relationship that is happy and full of love once more. Keep reading…

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After an Affair: Why You Are Still Angry

November 16th, 2011

After an affair, you’re angry—angrier than you’ve ever been.

It’s understandable. When the person you love and trust most in the world betrays you by cheating, and telling you lie after lie to cover their tracks, it’s only natural to feel angry.
You have every right to your angry feelings. This anger can be useful, but there comes a time when expressing your angry feelings gets to a point of diminishing returns, creating more problems than it solves.

In today’s blog, I will explain 3 reasons why, after an affair, you may be holding on to your anger, and offer some tips for expressing your feelings in a more meaningful way so you can begin to let them go. Read on…

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Revive and Rebuild Your Intimacy Sectors Post-Affair

April 21st, 2011

In the initial aftermath of an affair, it’s hard for you as the victim to think about how you’ll ever bridge the gap between here, amidst pain and anguish—and there, a strong partnership and intimate connection with your spouse.

The thought of being physical once again with your cheating spouse may be too much for you to consider right now. But to have a deeply fulfilling relationship once again—the kind of marriage you deserve—you will need to take steps to move in this direction at some point.

In this blog, I want to share with you the triangle that makes up total intimacy within a marriage, and two intimacy sectors to rebuild after the affair to help you move forward in saving your marriage.

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Surviving Infidelity and the Emotional Pain

April 14th, 2011

Infidelity causes a tsunami of painful emotions. Even the cheater isn’t immune to the emotional turmoil.

But the cheater’s turmoil can’t even begin to compare to the pain that you, as the victim of cheating, experiences. A spouse’s infidelity unleashes raw waves of emotion, creating ongoing internal devastation.

It can be tempting to want to sidestep these emotions, tamp them down, ignore them. But it’s not a healthy option.

In this blog, I want to share with you 3 options for processing those emotions in a way that is healthy—and that moves you forward so you can survive infidelity and salvage the pieces of your marriage.

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Cheating Husbands… are Wives Responsible?

March 31st, 2011

You found out your spouse had an affair, and the indescribable devastation you feel has shredded your emotions and taken over your every thought.

You realize that marriage is a partnership, and as such, there’s a part of you that wants to shoulder some of the blame for your spouse’s cheating.

Don’t you dare.

Your responsibility comes now, post-affair. In this blog, we’ll look at 3 key responsibilities you have now that the affair is out in the open and as you try to pick up the pieces of your life and your marriage.

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Coping with Infidelity and the Neglect Justification

March 24th, 2011

Cheaters can’t always say why they stepped outside of their marriage and had an affair. They’re probably not very sure themselves of the “reason” why.

When it comes to cheating, there is no clear reason that can ever make it okay to cheat. But victims of affairs always have a justification for why the affair happened, and it usually hinges on needs.

In this blog, we’re going to look at just 2 needs found within a marriage, and I’ll provide you with conversation starters to begin exploring these particular needs as you work to save your marriage.

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Rediscover Yourself after the Affair

September 7th, 2010

Reeling from the upheaval that results from the revelations during and after the affair, your world may seem shattered into so many fragments that you don’t know which piece to pick up first.

Perhaps you have a family to consider, children who could potentially be negatively impacted by your cheating spouse’s decisions—not to mention your home life and your ability to function as a part of the family. You obviously have your marriage to consider—it’s currently in shreds. You may also have a job to juggle—your inner turmoil could be throwing off your ability to focus.

In the last post, you learned 3 critical steps you must take before you can even begin your journey of rediscovery—as you work to survive the emotional destruction unleashed by your spouse’s affair. In this post, I’ll explain why it’s essential that you focus on yourself, and provide some steps you can take on the path to healthy rediscovery.

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