After an affair, when your marriage has been through a meltdown, you may wonder how to pick up, move forward—and feel love for your spouse once again.
Maybe you’ve done the work necessary to save and rebuild your marriage: worked through negative thoughts and images, and gotten off the emotional rollercoaster to something resembling solid ground. Many couples want to know: how do I fall in love with my spouse again?
In this blog, I’ll give you three key ingredients that need to be in place in order to be successful at finding love once more with your spouse.
One of the biggest heartaches for an injured spouse is the haunting images of their spouse’s lover, playing like a horror-movie in their head.
For victims of cheating, there are many reactions to this onslaught of images:
• Loss of sleep
• Lack of appetite
• Inability to focus on tasks
• Struggle to save the marriage
It’s not unusual to carry around these images in your mind. I’ll give you 3 steps for ridding your mind of them so you can get your life back and your emotions on the healing path.
Dealing with the aftermath of your spouse’s affair can be a harrowing time. Your spouse’s cheating may have been an assault on your self-respect, making you lose your sense of self-worth.
If your self-respect has been shredded and is in need of repair, read on. In this post, I’ll give you 3 keys to get you started on your return to a healthy sense of self-worth and respect for the great person you are.
Your spouse’s cheating has the effect of pulling the rug out from under you while also crumbling the foundation of your marriage and annihilating your vows to one another.
Despite the devastation, many victims of an affair have a desire to save their marriage, with the affair being just a very excruciating bump in the road. They think, “I have invested many years with this person—sacrificing, negotiating and accommodating—why should I give all that effort away to someone else? I want things to go back to the way they once were.”
In this post, I’ll show you why going “back” maybe isn’t such a hot idea, and give you some steps to get your efforts to save your marriage moving forward toward a stronger, healthier, happier marriage.
You may feel like your life imploded when you learned that your spouse cheated—or may still be carrying on an affair. The news rocked your feelings of stability and safety in the marriage. Your biggest question at the moment may be:
Should I go to counseling with my spouse, or should I drive straight over to the divorce lawyer?
In this post, I’ll help you answer this question by providing you a starting point: questions to ask yourself as you decide whether to seek marriage help, or divorce.
When you learn that your spouse cheated on you, there is a swirl of negative thoughts that hit you. You may feel numb at first. Then the questions start to creep in: “How can this be? Is this my life? Why would this person I love do this to me, to our family, to our marriage?”
Negative thoughts invade your mind, threatening to sweep away your ability to cope with daily life, to feel balanced, to focus on saving your marriage.
In this post, I’ll help you survive these insidious negative thoughts so you can recover your most prized personal asset: your own thoughts.
Marriage Help: Use a “No Closets” Rule
For your marriage to survive, in general or specifically through an infidelity, you need to help your marriage by building it on a framework of transparency. This means you and your partner must commit to being completely open about every aspect of your individual lives—especially if your spouse has cheated.
In this post, I’ll help you get started on—or continue in—your efforts to build your marriage and communication between you and your spouse, by employing a “no closets” rule.
Reeling from the upheaval that results from the revelations during and after the affair, your world may seem shattered into so many fragments that you don’t know which piece to pick up first.
Perhaps you have a family to consider, children who could potentially be negatively impacted by your cheating spouse’s decisions—not to mention your home life and your ability to function as a part of the family. You obviously have your marriage to consider—it’s currently in shreds. You may also have a job to juggle—your inner turmoil could be throwing off your ability to focus.
In the last post, you learned 3 critical steps you must take before you can even begin your journey of rediscovery—as you work to survive the emotional destruction unleashed by your spouse’s affair. In this post, I’ll explain why it’s essential that you focus on yourself, and provide some steps you can take on the path to healthy rediscovery.