One of the most emotionally-loaded conversations you could ever have is about an affair that you or your spouse has had. Many affair victims think that it’s critical to their recovery that they talk about the affair.
That isn’t necessarily so.
In this blog, we’ll look at whether or not it’s necessary to talk about the affair in the first place, and I’ll offer some guidelines if you decide it’s right for you.
A spouse’s affair can make you lose your identity. It can be such a shock to the system, you really don’t know what’s what anymore: who are you? Who is your spouse? Who is this paramour of your spouse?
Many affair victims become consumed with curiosity about their spouse’s lover. It can become an obsession, and if you’re the victim, you may find yourself feeling competitive against this person.
Let’s look at some warning signs that you’re competing against the paramour – and how it may be pushing your spouse away from rather than toward you.
In the initial aftermath of an affair, it’s hard for you as the victim to think about how you’ll ever bridge the gap between here, amidst pain and anguish—and there, a strong partnership and intimate connection with your spouse.
The thought of being physical once again with your cheating spouse may be too much for you to consider right now. But to have a deeply fulfilling relationship once again—the kind of marriage you deserve—you will need to take steps to move in this direction at some point.
In this blog, I want to share with you the triangle that makes up total intimacy within a marriage, and two intimacy sectors to rebuild after the affair to help you move forward in saving your marriage.