3 Barriers to Post-Affair Talk

August 17th, 2016

When a partner has cheated, not only is the disclosure excruciatingly painful for the victim on an emotional level… their search for answers can be frustrating.

And the cause of this frustration is none other than the cheater himself or herself… because their own actions are so repugnant, they’re uncomfortable discussing them!

It’s not necessarily that the cheater feels the victim doesn’t have the right to know. Rather, they wish they could erase their actions and pretend as if their cheating never happened.

In today’s blog, I’ll tell you the 3 barriers to having a post-affair talk, and then give you 2 tips for how to get the cheater to tell you what you need to know. Please keep reading…

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Did You Get a GOOD Apology? (4 Clues…)

July 20th, 2016

Your partner may have hurt your feelings by saying something unkind. Or worse, maybe your partner betrayed you by having an affair.

And maybe you received an apology of sorts, but you don’t feel as if your partner really got what they did to you. Maybe you doubt their sincerity.

Maybe you question your ability to accept an apology, and you question yourself: “Am I being too picky?”

In this blog, we’ll look at what makes an apology a good one, and I’ll give you 4 clues to look for to help you recognize a good apology when you get it. Read on…

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The Link Between Anger and Forgiveness

June 15th, 2016

Forgiveness is a challenge, and there is one obstacle in particular that could be preventing you from extending forgiveness to a partner who has wronged you.

That one obstacle is anger. Where anger lurks, forgiveness isn’t likely to occupy the same space.

For the victim, there is a process you must move through to get past the obstacle and into a place where you can either offer forgiveness or not—and be at peace with both your decision and where you are.

In this blog, I’ll tell you more about the process, as well as offer you 2 tips to move forward past the anger and into a space where you can decide if forgiveness is something you even want to offer. Read on…

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One Foot in the Relationship

May 16th, 2016

There’s one heartbreaking additional burden that some victims of affairs are forced to deal with, and that’s when the cheater keeps just one foot in the marriage, and the other is in the extramarital relationship.

What should you do when confronted with this horrible situation, where your partner’s indecisiveness is tearing you apart?

In this blog, we’ll look at what to do with a partner who thinks one foot in the relationship is fun living for the victim… and what the victim’s options are. Please keep reading…

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70% of Communication is THIS

April 6th, 2016

Sometimes, it’s what we don’t say that can land us in hot water with our partner.

Have you ever had that experience? You’re standing there, listening to what they have to say, when all of a sudden their face clouds up, their eyes scrunch into slits and they lash out at you…

You’re standing there wondering, “What did I do? I was just standing here listening!”

Most people fail to remember something very important: there is a spectrum involved with communication, and you may inadvertently be steering yourself off-message by forgetting this.

In this blog, we’ll get you back on message with 2 tips and make sure your communication across the spectrum is saying what you mean rather than sending mixed signals. Please keep reading…

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Stop Derailing Your Marriage-Saving Efforts (4 Guidelines)

May 11th, 2015

You may want to say to your spouse, “Let’s save our marriage and fall in love again.”

But your communication skills may be falling short. There are the things you don’t say, but what your actions may be shouting.

In this blog, you will learn how you could be derailing your own efforts to survive the affair and rebuild your marriage, and how to get your marriage back on track using 4 guidelines.

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The 3 Steps for Regaining Security, Post-Affair

March 25th, 2015

Presently, after the affair, your world may feel untethered. You may have lost a sense of security that your marriage once provided and the feel of a firm foundation beneath you.

Perhaps you have a family to consider, children who could be negatively impacted by your cheating spouse’s decisions. You have your marriage to consider, asking yourself whether you should try to save your marriage. You may also have a job to juggle—your emotional pain and turmoil throwing off your ability to focus.

In this blog, I’ll tell you why it’s essential that you focus on yourself, and provide some steps you can take to dig deep and regain a sense of security that can only be found in you. Read on…

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The 3 Barriers to Forgiveness

March 16th, 2015

One of the most difficult decisions you’ll make post-affair—beyond whether or not to save your marriage—is whether or not to forgive your spouse.

The choice is yours, and there’s no right or wrong. You’ll either want to grant forgiveness, or it will be something you can’t abide the thought of doing.

In this blog, we’ll look at three barriers to forgiveness, if you find yourself stuck. Read on…

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Reframe Failure, Save Your Marriage

June 22nd, 2011

So your spouse cheated on you, and now your marriage is neck-deep in crisis mode. You may feel like a failure: your marriage may very well be over, and everything you put into it was for nothing.

This experience has left you looking at the world through a very dark lens.

Are you an unworthy, broken person – and this is why you are in this predicament today, a victim of infidelity? Read on for the answer to this question.

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Cheating Husband? Social Media May Give You A Clue

June 15th, 2011

Virtual cheating may not be the traditional tryst we think of when we imagine infidelity, but it appears to be making a stab at becoming the new modern tradition.

If you look at news headlines over the past several months – even years – there seems to be a newly evolving means to cheat.

What separates modern adultery from what was more “traditional,” and how do you protect your marriage? Read on to discover the answer…

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