“Even Though Your Spouse Left And Said
They No Longer Love You… Doesn’t Mean
The Love Is Dead… It’s Just Covered Up”
In One Hour Discover The 3 Skills Needed to
Restore the Trust, Connect Emotionally And Rebuild
The Passion You Once Had When You First Dated
As Steve walked in the door from work, Jenny approached him and said, “We need to talk.”
“Not again Jenny! I just got home from work. Can’t it wait five minutes?”
“No, it can’t Steve. I want you to know I’ve filed for a divorce. I can’t put up with this anymore.
“You never want to talk to me. We barely ever spend time together. I don’t even know who you are anymore. And I refuse to continue in a relationship like that. I wanted to tell you before my lawyer got in touch with you. Tomorrow I’ll be moving into my mom’s for a while.”
“I’m not in love with you anymore.”
Have you heard those words recently? Has your spouse told you that they are no longer in love with you?
If these words have been spoken to you, in most cases it means your partner is ready to leave you, if they haven’t already.
I know it’s not easy to hear that, but it’s the truth. However, it doesn’t mean the marriage is over (even if they’ve left). In fact, over 41% of the couples I help online were separated before I showed them how to get back together (more on how to bring your spouse home later.)
Is the Love Really Gone?
Dr. Gunzburg’s Quick-Start Audio:
Discover how to enhance your success, avoid common mistakes, bring your spouse home and learn the secrets to rebuilding the love.
Listen to this special audio bonus where Dr. Gunzburg explains how to use his new program even quicker to rebuild the love even if you think it’s lost.
When a spouse says they no longer love you, that doesn’t always mean the love is dead. It may simply mean the love has been covered up by anger, frustration, resentment or other emotions.
Typically, this occurs because of an affair or years of neglect.
To justify these feelings, your spouse may even start rewriting history to match this feeling that the love has died. He or she might say things like, “I never really loved you,” “We’ve never had great sex,” “I married you out of a sense of obligation,” or, “I was afraid you would fall apart if I left.”
As difficult as this situation may be, hope isn’t lost because…
If You Were Once in Love,
You Can Fall in Love Again.
And today, I am going to show you how to do that.
There are three specific skills you can learn for reviving the loving feelings that once flourished in your marriage. These are not gimmicks, tricks or clever little psychological games.
These principles I will introduce were born after 35 years of counseling crisis couples. Couples who first came into my office acting more like enemies than friends.
Here’s the difference… they were willing to end the bad behavior (sometimes it was only one spouse acting alone).
However, most of these couples gave themselves a precious gift. Instead of divorcing, or remaining unhappily married, they now call themselves…
Lovers, Best Friends and Soul Mates.
They have fun together, laugh together, and they talk.
Your relationship can experience this level of change…
… even if your spouse cheated
… even if your spouse left
… even if your spouse says they no longer love you.
But I’m not talking about “getting your relationship back to where it was before the love evaporated.” As attractive as that might sound right now, it probably won’t work. Rebuilding a marriage where the loving feelings are already buried requires a different approach.
You need more serious “medicine” to “cure” the “ills” you are faced with.
I will share a discrete set of skills that has the potential not only to help you rebuild your relationship, but to make it better than it ever was.
But, my strategies won’t work unless you’re willing to put these principles into action.
I will show you how to take a critical look at your marriage and figure out what works for you and what doesn’t. You’ll learn how to analyze the parts of your marriage (even yourself) that are not working and figure out how you can change your behaviors to enhance your relationship. In short, you will…
Do What Works, Change What Doesn’t.
Examples and Stories of
Couples In Crisis
Follow along inside How to Rebuild The Love
Christine and Ralph *
Over the years, Ralph became angry and resentful as Christine became physically distant. Follow their story inside and see how Ralph communicated his needs for affection without making Christine feel threatened.
Martha and Todd *
Todd was blown away when Martha dropped the “D” word. He didn’t even know what to say. He never dreamed things had gotten this bad between them. Unfortunately he hadn’t heard Martha’s repeated pleas for connection and communication. Now he faces losing his wife of 28 years. Follow their story inside How to Rebuild the Love.
Some of what needs to change may be obvious to you.
There are problem behaviors that clearly need to change if you are going to rebuild the love in your marriage. Having a “relationship on the side” (that means an affair) is an example of a problem behavior that must change if you are going to rebuild your relationship with your spouse.
However, there are less obvious negative behaviors that you engage in when you identify your spouse as your enemy rather than your friend. I’ll help you root out these negative behaviors and eliminate them.
You’ll end the bad behaviors and replace them with positive actions—actions that compete with the problem behaviors and cancel them out.
That means if you have been lying, you’ll learn how to be honest; if you have been cheating, you will learn how to become faithful; if you have been nagging, you will learn how to be understanding.
It’s not enough to simply stop doing what was hurting your marriage. You MUST take positive steps to rebuild what was lost. That is the promise of my newly released (January, 2012) program: How to Rebuild the Love.
To help you do that, I will focus on three specific areas of your marriage.
Skill # 1: Restoring the Trust:
3 Steps to an Open, Honest Relationship
Are you concerned that there are more lies than honesty in your marriage?
Many people come into my office and say something like, “I simply can’t trust my spouse at all anymore.”
I find upon investigation that this statement is rarely true. The reality is that trust isn’t an “on or off” issue. It’s not as though a person trusts his or her spouse 100 percent or doesn’t trust him or her at all. Trust is a multi-faceted quality in relationships.
Examples and Stories of
Couples In Crisis
Follow along inside How to Rebuild The Love
Rachel and Clarence *
Rachel was sitting on the sofa. Her face was pale, and she was unable to speak. She felt like she was spinning. Part of her wanted to cry, but somehow she was too overwhelmed for the tears to come. She just sat listening to Clarence as she felt her world falling apart all around her. Clarence just confessed to his affair. Follow their story and watch the steps they took to save their marriage from divorce and restore the love.
In fact, I have found that when people usually talk about “trust” what they are really talking about is fidelity—which is only one dimension of trust. That is why I help clients understand trust in a new way: by introducing them to different dimensions of trust that operate in a relationship.
This is important because they are struggling with a way to move forward in their marriage, and dissecting trust this way often helps them do that.
By taking a closer look at the multi-faceted nature of trust, you may realize that there are some areas where you have strong trust, some where the trust is weak, and some where there is no recognizable trust left.
Understanding these differences will provide hope and help you realize you don’t have to “throw your partner away.” That is, you don’t have to assume you “can’t trust your spouse at all.”
Inside How to Rebuild the Love, you’ll discover how to rebuild the trust after it’s been lost by understanding exactly how trust works. You’ll follow the steps needed to repair the leaks, overcome the suspicion, talk about the fears and slowly, brick-by-brick, build assurances.
We’ll start by dissecting trust and explain the 7 dimensions and how they impact your marriage…
- Discover where trust still exists. (Build more confidence in your relationship by understanding where you do still trust your spouse and zero in on the areas that need to be repaired.)
- 3 steps to repairing the breach of trust in your marriage. (Following this process will allow you to begin again and set the stage for developing a deeper emotional connection.)
Next, we’ll move into the area of rebuilding honesty and learning how to reassure your spouse by becoming 100% transparent…
- How to clean the slate and restore the honesty. (Your spouse wants to be honest, they just don’t know how… Follow Dr. Gunzburg’s recipe for a transparent conversation.)
- How to talk again like friends. (Open up your spouse, disarm their defenses and have meaningful conversations… you’ll uncover the secrets to pulling out their thoughts, feelings and daily experiences…)
- How to be honest. (Follow these principles and break free from your addiction to lying.)
You will eliminate:
- Deceiving your partner
- Exploding in anger
- Being inattentive or insensitive
This first skill will teach you and your spouse (maybe for the first time) how to share everything freely, eliminate the lies and develop 100% transparency.
It is through the exercises of transparency that ALL of the liabilities that block your relationship from experiencing the loving feelings will become exposed and replaced.
This will be a very liberating experience because you will “flush the toilet” of all the old memories, eliminate the negative behaviors that are contributing to the pain in the relationship and replace them with positive “love-building” actions.
Within a few weeks you will begin to see the foundation of trust again.
Once we lay the groundwork for trust to be rebuilt, we’ll move on to our next skill:
Skill # 2: Deepen Your Emotional Connection
And Develop Intimate Conversation
Are you and your spouse unable to talk? All of that is about to change.
Examples and Stories of
Couples In Crisis
Follow along inside How to Rebuild The Love
Clara and George *
Clara and George didn’t know how to have a conversation without blowing up. Follow the 4-step process they used to transform their hostile relationship into one that is now calm, loving and safe. Follow their story inside:
What I see over and over again in relationships where the feelings of love have started to dissolve is that the people in the relationship are either communicating in unhealthy ways, or they simply stop verbally communicating altogether.
When this happens, you send the message that your spouse isn’t special to you anymore, he or she is a nuisance, and that your life would be better without your spouse.
This can be turned around, and I will show you how.
Couples typically stop talking when the one who is no longer “in-love” is often “in-anger” or “in resentment” because they feel their needs or expectations haven’t been expressed or haven’t been heard.
To open the door (even if it is currently closed) you’ll learn how to diffuse the anger and begin small conversations without stirring up confrontation.
Save The Marriage By Yourself
(Even if Your Spouse is Unwilling)
Using the techniques outlined in the program, you will experience enormous progress with your unwilling spouse. Within 7–10 days you will:
- Diffuse your spouse’s anger and defensiveness. (You’ll be amazed when you express your hurt feelings and your partner sympathizes instead of attacks.)
- Communicate without accusing. (Teach your partner how to feel safe again and become vulnerable with you.)
- Eliminate your spouse’s resentment. (Your spouse wants to feel understood… here’s how you can convince them that you “get it.”)
- Capture the affection, attention and appreciation you need from your spouse. (Your spouse will automatically “turn it on” without knowing what they are doing.)
- How to stop pressuring your spouse’s anger. (Before you pull the pin on their grenade, learn how to turn the conversation around.)
- How to change the attitude of your unwilling spouse. (You do not have to wait for your spouse to do anything — you can start improving your relationship completely by yourself, regardless of how poorly your spouse acts.)
To save your marriage and turn it around, you’ll need your spouse to engage in the process. However, that isn’t always possible in the beginning. That is why you will learn special techniques to “warm-up your spouse.”
There are several techniques you will implement and one is proving that you can be a “good listener.” Many spouses believe they have good listening skills. However, the reality is that they don’t. Negative behaviors, bitter feelings or emotional triggers get in the way.
You’ll uncover through simple exercises how easy it is to calm your feelings even if your spouse makes you feel angry… (you’ll learn how to put your own feelings of anger and resentment aside.)
- How to diffuse your own anger. (Proven strategies for remaining in control, staying clear of accusations and criticisms and making it easier for your spouse to listen and accept what you have to say.)
- Quickly prove you are a good listener. (Following this technique will heighten the emotional bond and help your spouse see you more as a friend than an enemy.)
- Learn how to understand each other. (You’ll both develop sympathy and a desire to know each other in a deeper way.)
Soon you will both be talking again without arguing. Once this happens you will build on your success by adding more positive actions to the relationship.
This is When The Love Will Reignite
To begin building the “in-love” feelings, I show you how to do little things that make your spouse feel special. Using these techniques will help remove your spouse’s defenses, remove the anger and reignite the love again.
- Quickly make your spouse feel like they are YOUR priority. (These 5 acts of kindness will quickly open new doors in your relationship and allow your spouse to feel more love and intimacy with you.)
- Become best friends. (10 Guidelines for discovering who your spouse is all over again at the deepest level and enhancing your intimacy in ways you never dreamed possible.)
- How to get your spouse to “hear what you’re saying.” (Once you make “safe-inroads” you will use these proven communication strategies to make it easier for your spouse to give you what you want.)
As you incorporate these 10 Guidelines for Intimate Communication into your relationship, you will deepen your emotional connection with your partner.
You are going to learn new things about your spouse and your relationship, and as a result you will likely feel love start to revive in your marriage which will open up your spouse’s willingness to want to spend more time with you.
That brings us to our third skill.
Skill # 3: Revive the Spark You
Had When Your Love Was New
Do you want to be as passionate as you were when you first started dating?
Think about what you were doing back then. You were intent about finding time to spend exclusively with each other. You were having fun with each other.
You were being romantic.
Examples and Stories of
Couples In Crisis
Follow along inside How to Rebuild The Love
Carol and Jack *
When they were young, they used to have so much fun together. Carol remembers the times when Jack would have her laughing so hard her belly hurt. He would tease her, flirt with her, and send her flowers at work with funny messages written in the card. That was then… Follow their story to discover how they turned their stagnant marriage into a new “fun-marriage.”
Having fun with your partner has the potential to create a series of positive emotional and behavioral responses in each of you. During an 1890’s experiment, a Russian scientist named Ivan P. Pavlov proved this point.
Pavlov successfully trained dogs to salivate to sounds instead of food. He did this by pairing a sound with the presentation of food. After some pairings, the food was no longer necessary—the dogs would salivate at just the sound as if the food were present.
Pavlov called this unconscious association a conditional reflex. Pavlov believed that he had created an altered reflex—an automatic response that occurs outside of consciousness.
Are you wondering how this applies to your marriage? Here’s how…
When you have fun in the presence of your spouse on multiple occasions, you will have good or fun associations when you are with your spouse at other times. This happens because you make an associated connection between the positive feelings you have when you have fun and the person with whom you have fun.
This is why having fun with your spouse is important.
Going on dates and having a good time help create a loving romantic spark between you. When this happens you will expose the tender feelings you have for your spouse. You make a move to show how much you care in a symbolic way, and sometimes these symbols are even more powerful than words can be.
Sharing these soft, secret parts of yourself is one of the ways you develop a deep emotional bond with each other. It will help you develop a sense of trust, safety, and respect for one another.
What’s more, it gives you a chance to show your partner how much you care in a way that is special and meaningful.
If you have not had fun in a while, or “forgot how to have fun,” you will learn inside the program how to quickly “hit the street” and have a good time. You will learn:
- How to decide what to do for fun. (This exercise will eliminate both of you saying… “I don’t know, what do you want to do?”)
- 13 fun activities you can enjoy with your spouse if you don’t have any ideas. (Going out and having fun with your spouse will help you restore the love, reignite the spark and allow you to create a marriage that is better than ever.)
- How to get back the romantic feeling you had when you were young. (Romance is an exercise that isn’t so complex, but it is a major component to saving your marital life.)
- Five favorite ideas for anyone who struggles with being romantic. (These simple, inexpensive yet effective methods are guaranteed to awaken the intimate feelings that have dimmed over the years.)
The exercises inside the program will get you both “off the couch” and outside the house to show one another new levels of affection and loving feelings.
Your spouse will love it, and as part of your larger effort, it has the power to help save your marriage.
Turn Your Relationship Around Today:
A Successful Alternative to Counseling
Changing the tide in your marriage isn’t luck. Luck won’t save your marriage.
If you want to survive, you need to do the right things in the right order with a sincere heart. If you are willing and able to do that, you can survive. Here’s how.
Two Options For Getting Immediate Help
You have two options for getting the help you need to save your marriage from a divorce and rebuild the love that is lost.
Option #1: Special Phone Counseling with Dr. Gunzburg
I spend my time doing face-to-face marriage counseling and phone counseling.
My hourly-rate is $260/hour and my wait time is a few weeks. I’d love to help everyone face to face, or even over the phone, but I know that is not always possible. With the wait time and the expense of 3–5 sessions, a personal one-on-one session with me could be an investment between $780 and $1300.
Option #2: Listen to my Audio Program and Follow My Step-by-Step Workbook
Fortunately, there is a much more affordable, quick and accessible way of getting help now.
As part of my mission to broaden access to high-quality marriage counseling, I developed a simple, step-by-step program you can use to rebuild the love from the comfort of your home.
That is why I developed How to Rebuild the Love, which is serious medicine for couples-in-crisis who are desperate to turn their marriages around and avoid divorce.
The program is designed to emulate a series of sessions with me. All three components are successful alternatives to counseling and will guide you through the process necessary to revive the love in your marriage.
This works well when your spouse refuses counseling, or counseling hasn’t worked.
All three components are audio downloads and PDF downloads. That way, you don’t have to wait for shipping. Your program will arrive instantly.
Component #1: How to Rebuild the Love After It’s Been Lost (Audio Program)
Download this one-hour audio interview and listen as Dr. Frank Gunzburg provides stories, examples and easy-to-remember illustrations that will help you apply the love-building techniques back into your marriage. All is not lost. The loving feelings are still there, they are just covered up. Discover how to win your spouse back.
Component #2: When Love Dies: Your Step-by-Step Program for Renewing Love in a Troubled Marriage
Before you allow your relationship to end because you believe the passion has dried up, follow Dr. Gunzburg’s 3-step recipe for eliminating the anger and resentment that stand in the way of the love, passion and emotional bond you once shared. This guide will be your step-by-step manual for saving your relationship.
Component #3: Deepening Your Emotional Connection: A Personalized Program for Enhancing Intimate Communication with Your Spouse
Quickly personalize the program and apply these marriage-saving principles into your relationship. These are the exercises I provide to my couples to help them change from enemies to best friends. Through this action guide, you will discover how to understand each other, how to develop fun activities and how to work through the trust-building process.
Special Bonus: Are You Trying
To Win Back Your Spouse?
January 10, 2012, I performed an extensive survey with 1256 married couples in crisis. Each of these couples was struggling with the same problem, which was how to rebuild the love that was lost.
One apparent problem I identified was that 41% of the couples were not living together. That would explain why 36% of the couples described their situation as desperate and willing to do anything to bring their spouse home.
That is why I decided to provide this special bonus report, along with my program, when you order today.
Proven Strategies for Bringing Them Home
What you NEED to Say and Do to Get Your Spouse to Come Home and Rebuild Even if They Told You They Want a Divorce
The pain, worry and frustration that you feel when your spouse leaves home can be overwhelming. The anxiety, depression and feelings of hopelessness cause many sleepless nights.
However, you are not completely helpless. Even though the strategies I teach are NOT foolproof, there ARE effective ways to improve your chances of bringing your spouse home.
The techniques in this guide are powerful, but they are NOT as straightforward and conventional as you might think. You may even be apprehensive about trying them. The choice is yours, but if you are desperate, these are the powerful TOOLS that work.
When a spouse is brave enough to test these proven methods, I’ve seen thousands of couples come back together and go on to have successful marriages.
All three components of Rebuild the Love and the special bonus report are yours for INSTANT DOWNLOAD when you invest in my program.
Order How to Rebuild The Love Today
Six Month Money Back Guarantee
When you order How to Rebuild the Love, you’ll receive a Six month 100% money back guarantee. That means if you don’t like how it works, simply email our customer support and we’ll refund all of your money.
If your spouse has left, or told you they no longer love you, you will want to download the comprehensive marriage-saving program today and begin rebuilding the love.
Within just six weeks, you can:
- Turn around your spouse’s anger and resentment…
- Convince your spouse to come home…
- Restore the trust and begin talking again…
- Learn how to have fun again…
- Eliminate ALL the negative behaviors…
… And make the marriage better than ever.
Here is How You Order
Instead of spending between $780 to $1300 or more and waiting weeks to counsel with me, you can work through the program right now for only $97. When you order today you’ll receive instant access to download:
- How to Rebuild the Love After it’s Been Lost Audio Program
- When Love Dies: Your Step-by-Step Program for Renewing Love in a Troubled Marriage
- Deepening Your Emotional Connection: A Personalized Program for Enhancing Intimate Communication with Your Spouse
Love-Building Training Audio
I am not a professional speaker but recently I recorded a getting started audio for the first 100 people who order my program.
During this special audio program, I will teach you how to use my program to enhance your success. I gathered questions ahead of time and worked through as many as I could to help you win your spouse back and rebuild your marriage.
If you know you need a little extra support, this audio program will really help. When you order today, you will get this special program as a bonus.
Details of the audio will be emailed to you.
Remember, when your spouse says they no longer love you, that doesn’t mean the love is dead. It may simply mean the love is covered over by their “anger and resentment.”
Through this program, you will learn how to break through their walls and win them back, and make your relationship better than ever.
I wish you and your marriage the best of health.
Frank Gunzburg, PhD.
P.S. In a remarkable survey recently performed with 1256 married couples in crisis we found that while over 73% went to counseling, with 29% attending 10 or more sessions, a surprising 41% no longer live together.
The other 59% rated their relationship as unhappy, but refused to divorce or separate.
Discover the keys to successfully turning your marriage around. Use this link to order How to Rebuild the Love today. Your order is protected by our Six Month Money Back Guarantee.
*To protect the privacy and confidentiality of individuals and families referenced through stories and examples herein, the names and pictures and certain other content details were modified to ensure such protection.